Hello From the Outside

Holy fucking shit. I think I wrote about Adele’s “Hello” when it first came out.

July 8th I was checking my VM. My ENT’s office called and left me a VM. Apparently even if you block a number they can still leave you a VM. So I saw “Blocked Messages    1 >”. I have very few numbers blocked; I think only random people I’m too stupid to give a fake number to, and M. Upon seeing the number, I knew it was from M. He called June 18 at 9:17AM. The day before Father’s Day was the first thing that stuck out in my head, not sure why. There was nothing to the VM, just a tv in the background, and then breathing right before hanging up. Obvi it wasn’t a pocket dial, even though he would later claim it was. I don’t think so, bud. Its virtually impossible to do that nowadays.

I brought up returning his call to one of my GFs and she suggested I reach out and see what it was about. Natch, I did because, have you met met? The most curious person, almost, ever. He was shocked to say the least. We “caught up”. What you can catch someone up on in your life when you haven’t talked in over a year. I think he told me he would call me later to catch up.. Somehow I knew he’d call me back after his dinner. He did and we “caught up” more. He told me there were a few things he wanted to tell me. I knew exactly what that meant. I was very blunt the last time we talked/I texted him. I believe before we hung up he said he’d call later in the week. Obvi that didn’t happen.

I actually reconnected with a guy 2 days later. So random. Then the anniversary of my dad’s passing day came. He finally called one Sunday morning either at the end of that week or the following, at 1AMish. I was cleaning out my closet (hello irony) and texting with the boy and an old coworker. I decided to answer. I could tell by his voice something wasn’t quite right. He asked me to pick him up and my first thought was, oh fuck, he’s in jail.” Nope, just at a bar?! He said he needed a friend, and I’m a sucker, so I picked him up, and he knew I would because I’m such a great friend/person.

On the ride to my place (not many places are open at 1:45AM) I was asking WTF was happening, why he needed a friend, etc. And he bombs me with he was engaged and he/she/they called it off on Saturday. Insert my calm face on the outside, and my WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WHY THE FUCK AM I THE PICK ME UP CALL?! Yes those are not complete sentences because my brain was all over the place.

So we talked it out, what little he wanted to talk out. Which consisted of him mostly wanting to hear about me and what was going on in my life.

He did tell me a few things I needed to hear for “closure”. Like how he regretted several things, like never telling me he loved me, not being there for me for my dad’s death, etc. My favorite i think, was that I was the best sex he’d ever had. hahahahaha DUH. Because you actually fell for me. I pointedly asked him why he never told me he loved me. He looked me directly in the eyes and told me he was a coward. Okay, that takes some balls to say that. Or alcohol. Either way, I give him props for finally admitting it.

Like the good friend person I am, I steered the convo back to his issue. To help him, I asked if he thought this was “it”, it was over, for good. He said something about her taking her ring off and leaving it on the table (I think it was table?) was “like a line in the sand”. I asked if he was positive, and if he was sure he wasn’t being too hard on her, because there were plenty of times he did that to me – stubborn asshole because his feelings were hurt without communicating with her and talking things out. God, I’m such a good ex gf! Around 4AM he took his shirt and shorts off and asked if he could sleep over on my couch. Didn’t leave me much choice did ya? I said yes, gave him a pillow and blanket and offered to charge his phone bc I knew it was either dead or almost dead.

At 7:30AM I woke up to his phone vibrating the fuck out of my makeup table. Annoying. So I got up, peed, took him his phone and told him she had called several times. I think he peed and crawled in bed with me. We cuddled (hey, fuck off I’m human) and talked more about his situation. Definitely did not sleep together or make out, and he left.

We caught up later the following week and I told him I couldn’t be his friend. That was one of the things he mentioned in our convo at 3AM. I told him that he couldn’t look to me to be the first one he told about things, that’s what his fiance/wife/person is for. Not me. Whomever he decided to spend his life with needed to be that person, that I couldn’t do it. It wouldn’t be fair to me. He sounded really sad and said he figured and understood. Super awkward hanging up. Hows that convo supposed to go? “Hi, I can’t be your friend or in your life, have a nice life!” Oh and I mentioned that I was really excited with the possibility of where things were going with this new(ish) guy. Side note: that only lasted a month. Leave it to me to get tired of someone after a month. Ha. In the words of Rihanna, “Didn’t they tell you I was a savage?”

After hanging up with M, I felt like he was wavering on getting back together with his ex. Whether or not he did, I have no idea. I just think that based on the little I know, the things he told me and him turning to me, means he’s not as “in it” as he thought he was. I also told him I found it puzzling that he would want closure with me after proposing to someone. #justsayin

So tonight I had a phone call with the medium I have seen before. Not for any particular reason. She actually brought M up though. She said I finally let go of that situation. It was not good for me. She said specific things, but I can’t remember them now. I’d have to go back and listen to the recording.

We talked about my dad, because we always do at some point. She said, you like butterflies don’t you? I laughed and was like yes. She said he sends me signs and sent me one in butterfly form recently. I laughed because he did. She said butterflies normally aren’t that clumsy, it was a sign. (I was at a friends pool sitting on the edge with her. A butterfly literally flew into my face. I pulled away like, wtf and asked her if she saw it. She said yea, its a sign from your dad. I was like I KNOW!) I told the medium I feel like my dad sends me signs a lot, mostly through songs. She said he did.

After our call, I went to the store, ate dinner, watched tv and gathered the materials I need to write an essay for a paper. I decided to put on some music and decided I wanted to hear Adele. I played most of the songs from her 21 album and sang along. 25 started playing after that and Hello came on. I just listened to it instead of singing along for some reason. The further into the song I had a lightbulb moment. I literally said out loud, HOLY FUCKING SHIT THIS IS SOOOOOO US. Me and M. I originally thought that when I heard the song the firs time, but especially after hearing it after he and I talked in person. So crazy, this life.

You go listen to the song, reread what I said about our convo and tell me that shit doesn’t give you chills. #craycray

May Bucket List Completions

Beyonce in concert!! Post on the coming soon..

Rihanna in concert (again)! Pics and video coming..

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Lure

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Le Macaron

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Pineapple chipotle chocolate, salted caramel, Belgian chocolate, Madagascar Black Vanilla, Raspberry, Lemon Cream (not pictured) and Lavander White Chocolate macarons.

Establishment

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world’s darkest bathroom – this was with flash

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 hilarious drink menu

June Bucket List Completions

None

Celeb sighting

It’s not every day you see one of the guys you work with walking Rick Ross out to his car.

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Realization

Anyone that knows me knows that I am 100% obsessed with Jimmy Fallon. Because, well, perfection. I have always thought he was hot dating back to his SNL days. I decided to watch Fever Pitch tonight. Super cute movie and Jimmy is freaking adorable in it.

While watching it, the way he said something caught me off guard. The phrase, what ever it was, reminded me so much of M. Then of course I was like GD…UGGGHHHHH. That’s the last person I need to think about. I mean, after so long someone shouldn’t still consistently in your thoughts, right?? 🙁

Also, apparently I’ve had a type since 1998.

Carrie Underwood in Concert

Whoops… I meant to post this much sooner. Carrie was in Atlanta Feb 1.

OMG. I can’t even. She is beyond amazing. I don’t care too much for country, but I’ve loved Carrie since her Idol days. She has only gotten better with time. I actually played one of her songs at my dad’s funeral. If you’ve seen Carrie perform on tv or heard her on the radio, she’s about 20x better in person. Is that possible? YES. She played the harmonica and the guitar – and was really good at both. I was impressed. I would definitely see her again. I have a feeling I will feel the same about Adele when I see her in October. My videos and pictures aren’t even really worth posting..but for shits n gigs…

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April Bucket List Completions

Little Trouble

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Mi Cocina

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March Bucket List Completions

nada 🙁 March was busy!

February Bucket List Completions

Carrie Underwood in concert

OMG. I can’t even. She is beyond amazing. I don’t care too much for country, but I’ve loved Carrie since her Idol days. She has only gotten better with time. I actually played one of her songs at my dad’s funeral. If you’ve seen Carrie perform on tv or heard her on the radio, she’s about 20x better in person. Is that possible? YES. I would definitely see her again. I have a feeling I will feel the same about Adele when I see her in October. My videos and pictures aren’t even really worth posting.

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The Optimist

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January Bucket List Completions

Jan 1 and I had already knocked 1 thing off my list: Sister Louisa’s Church of the Living Room and Ping Pong Emporium

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I have several new things going on so unfortunately this was the only thing I got to do. Booooo.

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Should be studying, buuuuut I can’t get my newest obsession out of my head..

that voice! several of their songs are really good…

this is also an obsession.

Pics

Fun times with friends lately..

Oct 2015: exploring PCM bc posing with a giant clock is totally normal. (I’ve always been drawn to clocks for some strange reason. I thought it was a “me” thing until I realized my dad was too.) My face literally lit up when I saw this giant clock. #likefatherlikedaughter #imweird 🕐🕑🕒🕓🕔🕕🕖🕗🕘🕙🕚🕛🕜🕝🕞🕟🕠🕡🕢🕣🕤🕥🕦🕧

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Nov 2015: While holding a phone to change settings, #hello came on. Naturally, I thought of this. #imusthavecalled1000times

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Dec 2015: Bogart, Christmas Parties and NYE

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even subconsciously giving the cake a 👍🏻

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December Bucket List Completions

 

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Doraku Sushi

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Honeysuckle Gelato

Made 2 new dishes: deviled eggs and

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White cake with cranberry filling and orange buttercream

November Bucket List Completions

H&F Burger (no pic of the amazingness)

Made 3 new dishes

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Southern Cornbread Dressing

Parmesan-Lemon Roasted Broccoli

Rosemary Roasted Carrots (no link because they weren’t that great)

Halloween

I have been meaning to post this but things have been hectic.

The night before Halloween I was at dinner with a friend when I got a text from a guy I went to high school with. He asked me to go to a charity event for Big Boi. Of course I said yes. Stankonia made my high school experience. It turns out my friend is a sound engineer for Outkast.

I’ve always believe in the Golden Rule, and thank God. Being nice to everyone, from the jock to the band nerd, pays off. It really paid off because this guy and I weren’t really friends, but my high school wasn’t huge and we knew one another. He spends a lot of time in LA and doesn’t know a lot of people in Atlanta, so he asked me to go. Pretty sweet deal. I talked my friend I was having dinner with into going. Here are some pics.

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ken and me

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Big boi

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There was some huge swing there so we took pics.

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joking around

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if you don’t find this picture funny you have no sense of humor.

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I love cards against humanity!

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more cards. brilliant idea!

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Hashtag! Just kidding, it could have been, but I didn’t ask. I just wanted a pic.

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As you may have guessed, I went as a Dominatrix. I like to think outside of the box and I really just thought the outfit was hot when I bought it a few years ago. I had no other creative ideas for it. It’s funny though because I bruise easily and had several bruises on my legs. I’m either a klutz or I have started sleep walking. I joked saying it was an occupational hazard.

The links below are clips from a performance Big Boi did that I MISSED! Still pissed about that.

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October Bucket List Completions

Portofino

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Highland Bakery (no pic)

Farm to Ladle

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Kaleidoscope (no pic)

Buttermilk Kitchen

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September Bucket List Completions

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Bartaco

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apple picking

August Bucket List Completions

Ziba’s Bistro

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Prohibition (again without a friend taking me)

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Highly recommend the Clover Club

Davio’s (didn’t get a pic)

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Henri’s

 

Nicki Minaj

A friend and I decided 3 days before Nicki’s concert in Atlanta to go. We had such a great time. Nicki is pretty awesome a boss. Here are some videos we took.

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July Bucket List Completions

Georgetown Cupcakes

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Cook Hall

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June Bucket List Completions

King + Duke

Seven Lamps

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May Bucket List Completions

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Drink out of a coconut

Tattoo Removal: Session 2

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Randoms

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Husky Men

The 10 Sexiest Things About Husky Guys

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1. You never want to stop hugging him because he is basically a human Charmin paper towel roll. Bonus if he’s wearing flannel which, come on, he almost always is.

2. He will never judge you for ordering seconds or being hungry even though you just ate. He eats when he wants to eat and what he wants to eat, and thinks it’s super cool that you do too.

3. He’s amazing at planning dates because he knows all the best burger places in town. The place you walk by all the time and have been meaning to try? Yeah, he’s already been there three times and knows exactly what you should order.

4. You can put your head directly on his collarbone and it still feels like a rolled-up blanket. As opposed to putting your head against a chiseled metal filing cabinet.

5. He’s got time for you. Since he’s not at the gym 24/7 staring at his own pecs, he has time to stay in bed and watch movies and eat cookies he probably baked for you before you came over.

6. When he gets a T-shirt thats a little too tight, his meaty bod looks way more tempting than a cold, hard six-pack ever did. Whenever I see ripped, hairless abs, I just assume his genitals are smooth plastic like a Ken doll’s. They’re probably not but still, is it worth the risk?

7. He’s accepted himself as he is, so he accepts you as you are. He’s not perfect and he doesn’t expect you to be either. Therefore: leg hair? Don’t care.

8. When he doesn’t get a haircut for a little too long and he looks like the mop-headed teen boys you loved in your youth. All that’s missing is a popsicle stain down the front of their striped shirt. Love it so much.

9. If something isn’t working in your relationship, he’s going to want to work through it.He likes to be comfortable, so he wants to make sure you’re both comfortable in the relationship. Therefore, with him, communication will always be a thing.

10. He is a human blockade for stuff you’d rather not see or deal with. If he sees you’re about to step in dog poop, he will literally put his massive man-body in front of yours so your shoes/day aren’t ruined. He doesn’t even think to do this; his body just knows it is what it must do.

9 Things Only Women Who Date Husky Guys Understand

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1. Not being able to breathe during hugs. That’s a lot of man.

2. And girl-on-top is your jam for the same reason. He’s just a tad heavier than you.

3. Feeling like a Polly Pocket living in your tiny Polly Pocket world. Even if you’re 5-foot-8, 170 pounds, you still feel like Thumbelina up in his bed.

4. Being able to use him as a human heat lamp in the winter. If you’re like me and you’re cold constantly, cuddling up to a husky guy is like being wrapped in a hug that was put in the microwave and also comes with a brownie.

5. But you’ll never be able to borrow his sweater and have it be like “sexy boyfriend fit.” Because it’s just a huge sack of wool that goes down to your knees and no one thinks that is sexy. Except maybe him because he rules.

6. Knowing he’d squash anyone who crosses you even if he’s not really that strong. Like, is he really any better at protecting you than a skinny guy would be? Who knows. But it feels that way sometimes and even if that’s not true, it’s fun to pretend he’s a superhero who would forcefully tell someone to “unhand” you.

7. Always having amazing food in the house. You know those guys you date and you wake up in the morning and you’re like, “What do you have to eat?” and they’re like, “Bottles of Corona and mustard,” and you’re like, “I hate this”? That will never, ever happen with him. Boy has stockpiles of food, and makes eggs with bacon and toast every morning. You are covered.

8. When you’re out and your shoes are killing you, he will always give you a piggyback ride. You basically have to beg him to put you down and everything about that is great.

9. Not having to find a nook on his chest when you’re snuggling. You can put your head literally anywhere on his chest and be comfortable as fuck. You don’t have to navigate away from his jutting sternum or various ribs; it’s just all pillowy, next-to-his-heartbeat loveliness forever and ever.

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